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How to become Web2.0'ish

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So you've been surfing the net while secretly wanting to launch your own Web2.0 website and becoming the next best thing since sliced bread. Well, look no further - here's a detailed guide to achieve instant success in your venture. (Note that almost all of these are mandatory regardless of the idea you have in your head.)

Drop the last vowel before the final 'r'
This is too important to be overlooked. When choosing your name and URL, drop the final vowel before the 'r'.
Example usage - hoobladogoodr ™
Notice my clever technique to drop the final 'e'. This is so important that even the 2.0 versions of Arnie's movies are going to be called Erasr, Predatr and Terminatr. Do not overlook!

Use the words 'Share', 'Connect' and 'Collaborate'
Please note that it does not matter what kind of problem you're trying to solve. Just use these words okay.
Example usage - Share your diary entries with strangers, Collaborate on your IQ test
Also keep in mind to keep these words in large bold letters. The rest can be as tiny as you want.

Always say its 'beta'
Keep your site in always-beta, even after multiple new features, multiple versions, multiple years and other multiples. And oh, don't forget to mention this along with the name of your site in small brackets.

Call it a 'Mashup'
Again, it doesn't matter what you build, call it a mashup for heaven's sake. You'll have everyone drooling I assure you. Keep the word 'mashup' in big bold letters and everything else tiny.
Example usage - This is a Mashup of potatoes and mud water

Claim you work on Ruby on Rails
Again this is important. All your public blogs/docs must state this regardless of the fact that you've actually used mod_perl or PHP or Django-Python. Just say that you used RoR and its halved your coding time.

Use 'feeds', 'tags' and 'folksonomy'
This'll get you far ahead of your competitors. Bonus points if you implement a tag cloud with big fonts for commonly used words. Additional points if these big words in your tag are 'share', 'community' and 'mashup'.

Give everything a rounded corner
Know this - all your graphics must be curved. Your buttons, menu's and whatnot. Rectangular shapes are passe. Even your dividers can have rounded endings. As they say Web2.0'ers prefer curves.

Have a facebook app
First call yourself a web-app and not a website and then post a facebook app for it. Determining how your content goes into FB is not that important, what is important is its presence.
Example usage - Subscribe to our facebook app to publish your report cards to the world

Have buttons to submit it
On every page of your site, have atleast 5 buttons to submit the page or link it to other Web2.0 sites. Use cool words like 'Digg it!', 'Stumble it!' or '"insert name here" it!.

Talk about the future with jargon
If you have a blog, keep talking of the just around the corner future with words like "Semantic Web", "Web 3.0" and "tracking the blogosphere". The more jargon you use, the better.

Good luck! :^:

3 Comments On This Entry

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Footsie Icon

29 May 2008 - 06:36 AM
Ha ha, classic! :D

Watch out world of Web 2.0 here I come!

Nice.
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Amadeus Icon

29 May 2008 - 06:53 AM
Love it!
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RodgerB Icon

30 May 2008 - 05:40 AM
I lol'd in my head. Not outside of me. But it was a lol from the programmer within. :lol:
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