Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

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66 Replies - 12081 Views - Last Post: 25 August 2009 - 09:22 PM

#1 X@MPP  Icon User is offline

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Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 09 August 2009 - 01:45 PM

Ok so i found a lot of these on a site http://coolsig.com/techies1.html
and i thought of posting the ones that i thought we funny and i want to see witch one you think are funny :P

I do know everything, just not all at once. It's a virtual memory problem.

Code so clean you could eat off it

I'm having a problem here. Do I put the serial number in the box that says 'serial number,' or do I put it in the box that says 'company'? - Oh, those poor tech support people

A computer is like an Old Testament god, with a lot of rules and no mercy. - Joseph Campbell

A computer scientist is someone who, when told to 'Go to Hell', sees the 'go to', rather than the destination, as harmful.

A core dump is your computer's way of saying "Here's what's on my mind, what's on yours?"

A good programmer is someone who looks both ways before crossing a one-way street. - Doug Linder

A program is a device used to convert data into error messages.

A)bort, R)etry, I)nfluence with large hammer.

ACK and you shall receive.

Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.

As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.

Behind every good computer... is a jumble of wires 'n stuff.

Being married to a programmer is like having a cat. You talk to it but you're never really sure if it hears you, much less comprehends what you say.

Beta testers who lie! Next time on Geraldo!

Beta. Software undergoes beta testing shortly before it's released. Beta is Latin for 'still doesn't work.'

BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!

C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot. C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg. - Bjarne 'Stumpy' Stroustrup

Computer Science: solving today's problems tomorrow.

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes

Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...

Epigram: Ada is the 400-pound gorilla of programming languages.

Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.

Error: Sector not found -- search behind couch? (Y/N)

File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)

Frequent lock ups are a symptom of not enough memory but only in the way that nosebleeds are a symptom of gunshot wounds to the head.

Geek by nature, Linux by choice!

Give me one good compiler and I can redesign the world.

God is real... unless declared an integer.

Hey! It compiles! Ship it!

I have yet to meet a C compiler that is more friendly and easier to use than eating soup with a knife.

If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce today would cost $100, get a million miles to the gallon, and explode once every few weeks, killing everyone inside.

Let's face the obvious. Yesterday we were nerds. Today we're the cognitive elite. Let's conquer. - Chester G. Edwards

Life is like an Adventure... BUT COOL GRAPHICS

Life's unfair - but root password helps!

Linux renders ships, NT is rendering ships useless.

Mac OS X. Because making Unix user-friendly is easier than debugging Windows.

Marketer to coder: "You start coding. I'll go find out what they want."

Mountain Dew and doughnuts... because breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...

Programmer's Drinking Song: 99 programming bugs in the code/99 programing bugs/Fix one bug/compile it again/now there's 100 bugs in the code! (repeat until bugs==0)

Programmers never die: They just GOSUB without RETURN.

Programming graphics in X is like finding sqrt(pi) using Roman numerals.

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning. - Rich Cook

Real programmers don't document. If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand.

Real_men_don't_need_spacebars.

Software isn't released, it's allowed to escape.

Standards are industry's way of codifying obsolescence

The Geek shall inherit the earth. - Linus 5:5

The programmer's national anthem is 'AAAAAAAARRRRGHHHHH!!'.

The three most dangerous things are a programmer with a soldering iron, a manager who codes, and a user who gets ideas.

There are two ways to write error-free programs. Only the third one works.

This message has been brought to you by the language C and the number F

You know you're obsessed with computer graphics when you're outside and you look up at the trees and think, "Wow! That's spectacular resolution!"

You know you've spent too much time on the computer when you spill milk and the first thing you think is, 'edit, undo.'

You've heard about the computer programmer that died while washing his hair in the shower. The instructions said, 'Lather, rinse, repeat.'

<LIFE><!----Insert boring stuff here----></LIFE>

A 14.4 modem makes you want to get out and push!

A Life? Cool! Where can I download one of those from?

A much wittier reply came to mind immediately after I clicked the 'Send' button.

BTW, FWIW, IMHO, AFAIK, yes. OTOH, AAMOF, maybe not. YMMV.

Dawn is nature's way of telling you to go to bed.

Don't make me use uppercase...

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach him to use the Net and he won't bother you for weeks.

He who laughs last is at 300 baud.

Home is where you hang your @

The truth is out there? Does anyone know the URL?

The Web isn't better than sex, but sliced bread is in serious trouble.

You know when you've been online too long when...You say BRB because you're going somewhere.

ya it a lot sorry :P

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Replies To: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

#2 J0K3R  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 09 August 2009 - 02:22 PM

Aaah your having a 1D10T error... :P
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#3 kewlkreator  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 09 August 2009 - 02:35 PM

Error: I cant run in safe mode. Run in dangerous mode? (Y/N)
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#4 mostyfriedman  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 09 August 2009 - 03:12 PM

* if debugging is the process of removing bugs from a program, then programming is the process of putting them in
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#5 DaneAU  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 09 August 2009 - 09:47 PM

Quote

Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.


Lol
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#6 OliveOyl3471  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 09 August 2009 - 10:22 PM

Freakin' awesome! One or two of those would make a nice signature. :P

You know you've spent too much time online when you're reading the Bible and it says, "Lo," and you're looking for the other L.
True story.
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#7 Raynes  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 09 August 2009 - 10:29 PM

Byte me.
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#8 PsychoCoder  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 09 August 2009 - 10:34 PM

View PostX@MPP, on 9 Aug, 2009 - 11:45 AM, said:

Frequent lock ups are a symptom of not enough memory but only in the way that nosebleeds are a symptom of gunshot wounds to the head.


That one made me laugh out loud
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#9 BetaWar  Icon User is online

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 09 August 2009 - 10:34 PM

There's no place like 127.0.0.1

Roses are #f00 violets are #00f

I was all up for joining the military until they told me there is no respawn in RL.

What frame rate does RL play at?

Nice list above :)
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#10 Gloin  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 09 August 2009 - 10:49 PM

I laughed so much I started to cry.. Dunno if that ever happened to me before.
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#11 gawdlike  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 10 August 2009 - 12:07 AM

View PostGloin, on 9 Aug, 2009 - 09:49 PM, said:

I laughed so much I started to cry.. Dunno if that ever happened to me before.


That should be added to the list of "you know you spend too much time on the computer when.." :P
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#12 Gloin  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 10 August 2009 - 02:32 AM

Yea, the thought struck me as well as I was crying.. :P
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#13 Bort  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 10 August 2009 - 02:34 AM

"Mr Worf, scan that ship"
"Aye sir, 300dpi?"

If at first you don't succeed, ship it anyway and call it version 1.0

The classic one:
There are 10 types of people in this world, those that understand binary and those that don't.

Software doesn't have bugs, it develops random features.
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#14 gabehabe  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 10 August 2009 - 04:46 AM

View PostX@MPP, on 9 Aug, 2009 - 07:45 PM, said:

A computer scientist is someone who, when told to 'Go to Hell', sees the 'go to', rather than the destination, as harmful.

Couldn't be bothered to read them all, but I found this one pretty funny :)
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#15 zombie_chan51  Icon User is offline

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Re: Funny Geeky/Programming sayings

Posted 10 August 2009 - 07:21 AM

C is a fast dance, on a wax floor, holding sharp knives.
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