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This post has been edited by v0rtex: 21 May 2011 - 05:31 AM
50 Replies - 11871 Views - Last Post: 26 April 2012 - 07:31 PM
MultiQuote
#18
OLH064
- Junior bit compressor
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Re: Jokes about software engineers
Posted 08 June 2011 - 10:17 AM
A bad programmer with bad commenting practices got laid off
and now works as a janitor.
Now he just writes scribbles on the bathroom walls
about how it really stinks and that somebody should clean up.
and now works as a janitor.
Now he just writes scribbles on the bathroom walls
about how it really stinks and that somebody should clean up.
#19
Rhymer
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Re: Jokes about software engineers
Posted 09 June 2011 - 12:00 PM
BenignDesign decided to go out on her own. She was shrewd
and diligent, so business kept coming in, and pretty soon she realized
that she needed an in-house counsel. She began to interview young
lawyers.
"As I'm sure you can understand," she started off with one of the
first applicants, "in a business like mine, our personal integrity
must be beyond question." She leaned forward. "Mr. Peterson, are you
an 'honest' lawyer?"
"Honest?" replied the job prospect. "Let me tell you something about
honest. Why, I'm so honest that my father lent me $15,000 for my
education, and I paid back every penny the minute I tried my very
first case."
"Impressive. And what sort of case was that?"
The lawyer squirmed in his seat and admitted, "He sued me for the
money."
and diligent, so business kept coming in, and pretty soon she realized
that she needed an in-house counsel. She began to interview young
lawyers.
"As I'm sure you can understand," she started off with one of the
first applicants, "in a business like mine, our personal integrity
must be beyond question." She leaned forward. "Mr. Peterson, are you
an 'honest' lawyer?"
"Honest?" replied the job prospect. "Let me tell you something about
honest. Why, I'm so honest that my father lent me $15,000 for my
education, and I paid back every penny the minute I tried my very
first case."
"Impressive. And what sort of case was that?"
The lawyer squirmed in his seat and admitted, "He sued me for the
money."
#20
ButchDean
- Ex-Pro Games Programmer
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Re: Jokes about software engineers
Posted 09 June 2011 - 12:10 PM
Why do programmers always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up?
Because DEC 25 = OCT 31
Because DEC 25 = OCT 31
This post has been edited by ButchDean: 09 June 2011 - 12:10 PM
#21
ishkabible
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Re: Jokes about software engineers
Posted 09 June 2011 - 06:06 PM
let's try this...
knock knock
knock knock
#23
ishkabible
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Re: Jokes about software engineers
Posted 10 June 2011 - 06:20 PM
mkdir
#25
ishkabible
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Re: Jokes about software engineers
Posted 11 June 2011 - 06:11 PM
sorry did you mean sudo mkdir who?
#26
ButchDean
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Re: Jokes about software engineers
Posted 11 June 2011 - 06:25 PM
ishkabible, on 12 June 2011 - 02:11 AM, said:
sorry did you mean sudo mkdir who?
I hope you never live that down, ishkabible!
#27
ishkabible
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Reputation: 1526
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Re: Jokes about software engineers
Posted 11 June 2011 - 06:55 PM
lol, i posted "knock knock" with out a joke. you posted back and i had to come up with something 
#29
OLH064
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Re: Jokes about software engineers
Posted 20 June 2011 - 12:39 AM
Program "RONALD" not found.
Syntax error 02: program not found
Invalid memory access by program "RONALD"
Program "RONALD" has created a system error
System must restart immediately
...the assembly programmer from 1961 wakes up with a grin
"What a great dream! the exit code ran flawlessly and restarted the machine!"
Syntax error 02: program not found
Invalid memory access by program "RONALD"
Program "RONALD" has created a system error
System must restart immediately
...the assembly programmer from 1961 wakes up with a grin
"What a great dream! the exit code ran flawlessly and restarted the machine!"
#30
gabehabe
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Re: Jokes about software engineers
Posted 23 June 2011 - 01:03 AM
Actually an engineering joke rather than software, but still applies.
An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there. The engineer said, "I like both." "Both?" Engineer: "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and get some work done."
An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there. The engineer said, "I like both." "Both?" Engineer: "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and get some work done."
This post has been edited by gabehabe: 23 June 2011 - 01:05 AM
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