8 Replies - 837 Views - Last Post: 30 May 2007 - 06:35 AM

#1 1lacca  Icon User is offline

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New encryption, no encryption

Posted 29 May 2007 - 12:27 AM

Here is an interesting piece. Ok I'm a bit proud because it is partly done here :)
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#2 capty99  Icon User is offline

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Re: New encryption, no encryption

Posted 29 May 2007 - 01:52 AM

"the former spanish colony of texas"

wtf.

how about "the former english colonies of the united states" while were at it.

and i'm a bit proud cause its partly done here. :)

so pretty much 1lacca and i , together, made this work.
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#3 Nova Dragoon  Icon User is offline

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Re: New encryption, no encryption

Posted 29 May 2007 - 06:36 AM

However this looks like it would be hell on communication speed. They state already losing 1/2 of the commincation time due to noise junk.

"If hackers do realise they are listening to a message then they cannot tell what it is because it's impossible to tell whether a person has a high or low resistor turned on."
So what if the hacker guesses? 50%(I know bad probability falicy) chance of getting it right, is not unbreakable it seems to me.

And the part about sending parties knowing when a hacker is on their line, well then they can't send the rest of their message.

Go Go former Spanish Colony of Texas.
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#4 MarkoDaGeek  Icon User is offline

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Re: New encryption, no encryption

Posted 29 May 2007 - 11:14 AM

I think I'll refer to Texas under that name from now on.
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#5 supersloth  Icon User is offline

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Re: New encryption, no encryption

Posted 29 May 2007 - 12:10 PM

oh, you know I will.
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#6 Nova Dragoon  Icon User is offline

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Re: New encryption, no encryption

Posted 29 May 2007 - 12:24 PM

You pretty much have to now.
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#7 1lacca  Icon User is offline

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Re: New encryption, no encryption

Posted 29 May 2007 - 11:53 PM

The Inquirer is virulent.. much.
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#8 pioSko  Icon User is offline

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Re: New encryption, no encryption

Posted 30 May 2007 - 12:55 AM

TheInq always creates satirical names for companies and people.. I used to have a list of them but lost it..

King of the Universe Sir William Gates the Third
Printer ink maker Hewelett Packard
Cappuccino company (Apple)

they have the most for Microsoft... ie. the Vole.. and a person from Microsoft is Vollish
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#9 1lacca  Icon User is offline

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Re: New encryption, no encryption

Posted 30 May 2007 - 06:35 AM

Here are they from the source itself.

Quote

A
ATILLA Canadian graphics company... suggested by a reader
AZALEA Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. The Royalty of the Garden 2. A "better audio" which includes Dolby Digital sound

B
BABYZILLA Transmeta
BANIAS Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. A place in Israel 2. A codename for a .13 (micron chip) which doesn't obey the First Law of Megahurts Madness (qv)
BARTON AMD Roadmappery (qv) 1. A character in The Simpsons 2. A core of a Chimpzilla (qv) microprocessor
BENCHMARKETING The art of converting technical performance of a system into a tool of marchitecture

C
CANTERWOOD Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. A golf and country club 2. An Intel chipset, the 875P, which uses DDR 400 memory and "Kicking Pat" (qv) technology
The Evil Doctor Spinola (qv) CENTRINO Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. The Italian word for a doily 2. The name for a dart flight adopted by La Intella (qv) to combine wireless technology, notebook chipset and Pentium-M (Banias/Dothan) microprocessors
CHIMPZILLA The lesser Chipzilla, also known as Advanced Micro Devices (AMD)
CHIPZILLA The Mother and Father of all Zillas. See also www.chipzilla.com
CLAWHAMMER AMD Roadmappery (qv) 1. A name for King Edward I, also known as Longshanks, one of the most successful potatoes who Hammered the Scots, both male and female 2. A type of banjo music 3. A future AMD microprocessor aimed at the desktop (qv)
COINTREAU 1. A drink 2. The INQ word for Intel's Conroe chip
CONVERGENCE COWBOY A man who eats, breathes and inhales silicon particulates while simultaneously huntin', fishin' and shootin'

D
DEC Lair of the Alpha Male
DEERFIELD Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. A place in Massachusetts 2. A place in Illinois 3. Chipzilla's name for a member of its Itanium (qv) family which will have less cache (qv) than the Madison (qv) but more cache than the McKinley (qv)
DESKTOP 1. The top of a desk 2. A computer which sits on 1
DOLDRUMURAI A memory manufacturer that's not doing too well
DOTHAN Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. A city in Alabama 2. La Intella's 90 nonometer (qv) shrink of the Banias (qv) Centrino (qv) notebook technology
DRAMURAI A memory manufacturer

E
EMAIL of the species is deadlier than the male
EMAL Nasty, virus laden email
EMOLE of the species is generally Eva Glass.
EVOLE Microsoft employee who leaks information about Vole (qv) car parks being too far away from the campus. Also see "Evole be to he who evole speaks"
EZRA Some old geezer with a Victorian first name

F
FIRST LAW OF MEGAHURTS MADNESS Thou shalt use the frequency of a microprocessor to compare it against thine competitors unless the First Law of Marchitecture compels thee to forget that Megahurts Matters

G
GARTNER, THE MOST NOBLE ORDER OF Honi soit qui mal y pense. Market research firm. A reader points out we've mistakenly identified the Most Noble Order of the Garter with the Most Noble Order of the Gartner. He says that he believes the motto of the later is "Honi soit qui mal expense", which loosely translated from the Old French means "The same to those who don't pay through the nose". We're unable to contact an Old Frenchman at press time to verify this translation.

GRAPHZILLA Nvidia. Is it architecture, or marchitecture?

H
HYPETHREADING A design feature which allows a single processor to maintain two stalled threads
HYPETRANSPORT 1. Faster trains and buses in the UK. 2. AMD Roadmappery which eulogises the benefits of no bottlenecks

I
i The ninth letter of the alphabet, which *ntel tr*ed to trademark
INTELGRAPH A firm that has managed to extract whopping amounts of money from Intel, formerly known as Intergraph
ITANIUM, ITANIC Very collectible chip from Intel which because of its rarity costs $3,990.

K
KESSLER Intel Roadmappery (qv). 1. Shaping the future of physical rehabilitation 2. An Intel 2004 reference architecture
KICKING PAT Gelsinger. 1. The man who kicked Mad Mike Mageek 2. The man who invented the 386 instruction set 3. The man who keeps losing bets to Andreas Stiller 4. The tweaked turbo mode in the 875P Intel chipset

L
LA GRANDE Cunning plan hatched by La Intella (qv) to make our computing more wildly Trusted (qv) in the future
LA INTELLA The most beauteous semiconductor company in the whole cosmos
LINDENHURTS A chipset from Intel with a painful code name

M
MADISON 1. The fourth president of the USA (1809-1817) described by Washington Irving as a "withered little apple-John" 2. The third member of the Itanium (qv) family which has more cache than the second member but less cache than the fourth, unless the fourth is really the third
MARBLE FALLS Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. Codename for the Elgin Marbles, which Greece wants the UK to hand over 2. Intel codename for a reference system for a possible future PC
MARCHITECTURE The "seamless" union of architecture and marketing, exemplified in the long-running "chip wars" over "clock speed" and such campaigns as "Intel Inside"
MARMOSETZILLA A small Zilla of the VIa persuasion
MICRONS 1. Multiple instances of an American Dramurai 2. Symbol of the INQUIRER 3. Greek letter of the alphabet 4. Geek letter of the alphabet

N
NEHALEM Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. A city in Oregon 2. A future Intella chip which comes a little after Tejas (qv) 3. Contributed by a reader: Big old aliens, who in thoughtless cruelty, genetically modified some apes, resulting in humanity. Nothing to do with Nephilim (qv Banias)
NEWISYS 1. Name of an Egyptian goddess, Nu Isis 2. Name of an American firm
NONOMETER After microns got too small for semiconductor firms to use, they decided to measure the line width in nonometers instead. So called because at the time of writing we haven't seen a nonometer yet
NORTHWOOD Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. The safest place to be in the event of all out nuclear war because it's the HQ of Nato in Europe 2. A scary spot in Liverpool 3. The core (qv) of an Intel microprocessor with lines measuring .13 microns (qv)
NOTEBOOK 1. A very inexpensive storage medium which only requires a pencil to make it work 2. A very expensive computer which goes out of date in a very short period of time

O
OPTERON AMD Roadmappery (qv) 1. A made up name by AMD marketeers 2. A 64-bit AMD processor to be used in the server market
OUT OF FOCUS GROUP (OOFG) Assembles every month to get out of focus, and assembles daily at the Hermit's Cave to stay out of focus and off topic

P
PABSTER, THE Unlikely combination of Tom's Hardware Guide and The Rogister
POWERSVILLE Intel Roadmappery (qv) A future "concept" PC design
PRESCOTT Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. The deputy prime minister of the UK, famous for his boxing skills 2. A future Intel microprocessor using 90 nonometer (qv) technology which succeeds the Northwood (qv) core (qv)

R
RAMBUS A caring sharing intellectual property firm which has devised IBMs (IntelDeveloperForum Ballistic Missiles) powered by nothing more than a piece of elastic and Steve Tobak
ROADMAP Documents used to paper the walls of famous London pub, the Porcupine
ROADMAPPERY Future, perhaps unfilled plans that semiconductor firms have for future, perhaps never realised semiconductor products (See also The INQUIRER guide to roadmaps)

S
SCHEDULE A set of dates set by marchitectureers and used to develop roadmaps which are then provided to development engineering
SCOTTSDALE A very interesting chipset that will support every microprocessor of the past, the present and the future
SECURE OS Software's version of literature's unicorn
SECURITY PATCH An item permanently stored in the "to do" folder
SLOWARIS The Solaris operating system. Unrelated to the remake of the Slowaris film.
SMOKE AND MIRRORS The technical basis for future products, and also means an industry standard
SPINDOWS The graphical user interface of the Good, the Bad the Ugly Spinolas (qv)
SPINOLA A public relations persona with three different characters, the "Good Spinola", the "Bad Spinola" and the "Ugly Spinola".
SPRINGDALE Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. A place in Arkansas 2. The i865x chipset
STATE OF THE ART Expensive, loud and fragile. Occasionally functions for brief periods. In computer hardware terms, the "art" may be pottery
STATESBORO Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. A brand of cigarettes with a cowboy on the front [you sure about this? Ed.] 2. A future reference platform Intel is cooking on the back burner 3. A place in Georgia

T
TEJAS Intel Roadmappery (qv) 1. Sanskrit word for fire 2. Mexican name for Texas 3. Future microprocessor from Intel which will use Land Grid Array (LGA) technology
TRUSTED COMPUTING PLATFORM Widely, not to say wildly, Mistrusted computing platform

U
USER FRIENDLY a correct description, requiring only that the user be a masochist. otherwise, User Fiendly.

V
VOLE "I am a Vole and I live in a hole". Microsoft

W
WIBBLE Wibbleware launches Spindows (qv)

Y
YAMHILL 1. An Oregonian Hamlet. (Alas, poor Baldrick - er, Barrett, I knew him well.) 2. A Chipzilla processor design that dares not speak its name. (To be, or not to be, that is the question.)

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