My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

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80 Replies - 5414 Views - Last Post: 26 July 2012 - 07:28 PM

#1 BenignDesign  Icon User is offline

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My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 05:12 PM

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Just two short months ago, the older of my children was a sweet, innocent 10-year-old. Then she turned 11-going-on-30 and has since been taken over by a snarky, perverted mutation of her former self.

Today, driving along with both my daughters in the backseat, my younger child began making faces and talking in a demonic voice. I commented to my older child, "We need to do something about your sister... sedatives.... exorcism..."

Her response? "...abortion..."

Just a few minutes ago, this same child proceeded to tell me that during the recent remodeling of her bedroom at her father's house, she found a book in her dresser called "Simply the Best S-E-X-ual Positions." Last weekend, she borrowed her dad's phone to Google something and when she pulled up his web browser, it was on a video of "two people doing 'it' on a trampoline."

Her thoughts on all of this? "They told about all this stuff in school, but at least now I got to see how it actually works because they didn't show us this stuff at school and I was wondering what it looked like in real life."

I really have no point for discussion here. I just wanted to get this down in a public forum in case I go completely insane in the near future, you can all point my family toward the red flags. And I can't share these nuggets on Facebook or my mother and her preacher will be spouting bible verses and putting the child on prayer lists.

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Replies To: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

#2 no2pencil  Icon User is online

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 05:14 PM

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What a total let down B9. I mean, no doubt this is serious to you, but I was expecting more discussion of her actually trying to kill you.
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#3 BenignDesign  Icon User is offline

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 05:15 PM

A series of mini-strokes is bad enough.
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#4 no2pencil  Icon User is online

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 05:17 PM

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Once I pulled up my web browser & it was on a video of "a series of mini-strokes on a trampoline."
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#5 Benzoate  Icon User is offline

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 05:43 PM

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They told about all this stuff in school


They should really ask parent's permission before going and teaching children about sex at such a young age...
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#6 Utael  Icon User is offline

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 05:51 PM

Sounds like her father needs to be killed... Both happened at his house... Either way its probably her friends that are giving her this attitude. She may grow out of it she might not... Just don't let it upset you. And I think this would be a good time to show her what can happen as a result of two people on a trampoline (stds, pregnancy... Try to track down some really graphic photos....) And please educate her, don't just shove it under the rug... My parents did that and look how messed up I am.
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#7 no2pencil  Icon User is online

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 05:56 PM

View PostUtael, on 21 July 2012 - 08:51 PM, said:

Try to track down some really graphic photos....

A simple Google Image search for herpes or syphilis is enough. These types of images are not difficult to track down.

What's the fathers cell number? I'll text some to him :)
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#8 Benzoate  Icon User is offline

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 07:02 PM

My biology teacher scarred me for life with one picture...

Spoiler


that is a good one to show her even though it is tapeworms.. just lie and say it is some std o.O

This post has been edited by Benzoate: 21 July 2012 - 07:03 PM

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#9 BenignDesign  Icon User is offline

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 07:13 PM

View PostBenzoate, on 21 July 2012 - 08:43 PM, said:

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They told about all this stuff in school


They should really ask parent's permission before going and teaching children about sex at such a young age...


It's called "sex ed". It happens in 4th grade. They send home permission slips. It's when they tell the girls about magically sprouting boobs and getting their special monthly friends and give them a very brief skimming over of how babies are made.
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#10 modi123_1  Icon User is online

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 07:41 PM

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give them a very brief skimming over of how babies are made.

Yup.. it's definitely nap time for me.. I read that as 'skinning' and no 'skimming'.. *sigh*
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#11 Nykc  Icon User is offline

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 07:46 PM

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"Simply the Best S-E-X-ual Positions." Last weekend, she borrowed her dad's phone to Google something and when she pulled up his web browser, it was on a video of "two people doing 'it' on a trampoline."


I am intrigued, this trampoline thing actually has some sort of value beyond a bunch of challenged kids hopping around in the backyard? I need to find one of these trampolines, thanks for the tip.
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#12 jon.kiparsky  Icon User is online

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 07:53 PM

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View PostUtael, on 21 July 2012 - 07:51 PM, said:

Just don't let it upset you. And I think this would be a good time to show her what can happen as a result of two people on a trampoline (stds, pregnancy... Try to track down some really graphic photos....)



Photos of the results of pregnancy should not be hard to track down. You might even have some on your camera right now.

"Hey, kid you see this?"
"Yes, it's me"
"Right - see what happens if you're not careful?"
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#13 Benzoate  Icon User is offline

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 08:18 PM

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It's called "sex ed". It happens in 4th grade. They send home permission slips. It's when they tell the girls about magically sprouting boobs and getting their special monthly friends and give them a very brief skimming over of how babies are made.


o.O... I must of missed that class then....... >_>
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#14 BenignDesign  Icon User is offline

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 08:23 PM

Or your mom didn't sign the form and they took you to the loser room for the afternoon.
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#15 modi123_1  Icon User is online

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Re: My daughter is trying to kill me </melodrama>

Posted 21 July 2012 - 08:39 PM

wow.. if benzo was in the room with the rest of the mouthbreathers - that opens a can of possibilities of what other classes benzo missed.. ha..
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