186 Replies - 10453 Views - Last Post: 17 June 2013 - 04:19 PM
#1
Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 06:32 AM
The short of it: some guy from my hometown was ON A HILL, jacking up his mobile home, when *surprise!* the jack let loose and the trailer landed on him. I'm really wondering who it is - if I possibly went to high school with this person. The fire chief (my brother-in-law) isn't spilling the details.
Overall, I guess I'm just hoping the actual events that brought about this man's decision were rooted in far more planning and logic than the story I've created in my head.
What kind of odd news stories have come from your neck of the woods? Or have you created an awesome back-story to go with the piece I posted? I want to hear them!
Replies To: Local Yokels
#2
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 06:34 AM
fire
shooting
fire
theft
traffic
in that order on a daily basis
#3
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 06:36 AM
#4
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 06:36 AM
#5
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 06:45 AM
#6
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 06:49 AM
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Yawn. Big news this summer was two people dying from ODs at the Identity Festival in the arena in town.
#7
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 07:36 AM
The town was in the world record books for most bars per capital, which gives you some idea what we're dealing with. Lots of bicycle riders; drunk Polish guys who've lost their licence. One drives the bike with his elbows, so he has one hand free for the cigarette and the other for whatever is in the brown paper bag.
We name our joggers. "Molasses Man" is still around, but I haven't seen "Dances with Cars" for a while; not a surprise, I suppose.
The town is responsible for most of the asbestos production in the US. Locals recall "pink snow." On the up side, house fires are very rare; most houses being sheathed in fire proof material.
#8
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 07:44 AM
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It's said to represent your true, and perhaps hidden, personality.
Some people say they can see auras.
Others say they rely on special camera equipment to show people what's really behind their true self.
Some sources say the first aura photograph was taken by Nikola Tesla in 1890 in a dangerous experiment involving high amounts of electricity.
Lost and found..
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"It's sort of like seeing a ghost. You don't ever expect to see it again," said Gerald Kubiak.
Five months ago -- his bicycle fell off his bike rack on Interstate 680. And now it shows up for sale on e-bay. "This is unsafe merchandise. This is a bike that fell off a car at 60mph on the interstate."
Missing Bicycle Turns Up on Ebay
Classy cheerleaders..
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Every Friday night, the Papillion-La Vista South cheerleaders smile, flip and yell to the crowd to back their team.
Derek Caster knows how much work the girls put into their routines with practices during the week. He’s been friends with many of the cheerleaders since junior high.
“Since my mom's the coach, it keeps the friendships there,” explained Derek. “It's not, 'Oh, we're cheerleaders now. We're too cool.'"
That’s evident as soon as Derek enters the room where the girls practice. Many stop their conversations or routines to yell hi to the Papillion-La Vista South senior.
They’ve also watched Derek over the years, as Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy has slowly changed his life.
“Many of us have known Derek since he wasn't even in a wheelchair,” described cheer captain, Marissa Jeffery, through tears. “It's kind of emotional for many of us.”
#9
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 07:49 AM
In Columbus
Let's see todays news. Teen dies car surfing http://www.dispatch....ar-surfing.html
Inmates crochet plastic bags into sleeping mats for the homeless
http://www.dispatch....-the-weary.html
In Akron
Ohio couple says a stray cat saved their lives
http://www.ohio.com/...-lives-1.337085
My personal favorite:
Woman finds out late husband was also her father - http://www.ohio.com/...father-1.332813
#10
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 07:54 AM
From a smaller town than that - news title: Nihilistic nematode ravages Scotch pines. Someone flipped to a good page in the dictionary!
#11
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 07:58 AM
#12
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 07:59 AM
#13
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 08:02 AM
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That rhythmic counting pattern acts as a timing and movement roadmap for the members of the Columbus Discoverers Color Guard while they loop, twirl and flip their flashing flags in a synchronized routine on their high school practice ground.
Sophomore Jake Parker is the lone male lending his voice to the chorus of cadenced counting as the 24-member team aims to move as one in seamless precision while performing with the CHS marching band.
“We count out loud in practice, but we count in our heads during competition because we need to keep smiling (for audiences and judges) while performing,” Parker said with a slight grin during a break from practice.
Lone male joins CHS color guard
#14
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 08:07 AM
#15
Re: Local Yokels
Posted 25 September 2012 - 08:13 AM

I think the bigger story is the Columbus Discoverers are not fielding a rifle twirling team this year!
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