[strawhat89]

This just happened. Got a ticket from some manager saying he clicked on a button but nothing happened. He said he wanted this fixed pronto and provided a screenshot to help. Problem was the button he was ranting about was not present in the screenshot or in the page. God knows what he clicked. Thinking of a way to tell this to him without being sarcastic.

[stackoverflow]

"I tried to reproduce the bug but I couldn't-- do you mind showing me?"

[sithius92]

NeoTifa, on 12 October 2012 - 04:42 AM, said:

Well, I'm not in the computer industry, I'm actually like in the construction industry, more specifically HVAC. I got customers all the time in the school district I commissioned like

them: "omg I'm freezing in here can you turn up the temperature?"
me: "ma'am, it's 75 deg in here..."
them: "well I'm cold, and you guys made it to where I can't turn it up!"
me: "okay." *walks off
person down the hallway that is fed by the same air handler snags me
person: "omg, it's a blazing inferno down here, can you turn it down? It has to be like 90 deg in here!"
me: "says right here it's 75 deg"
person: "well I'm hot"

OMFG!!! I can't set the temperatures to please everybody's body thermostat! Especially if a big chunk of the hallway is being fed by the same air handler! asdfjkadsfljsdjflksjdfklasj!!!!!!!!!!!

I remember reading a solution someone had to this problem. They bought a dial thermostat and stuck it to the person's cubicle wall. The person then thought they could control the temperature and hadn't complained again.

[strawhat89]

Yeah well, that makes it sound like a failure on my part doesn't it? Make him think, 'This guy is useless, I provided him a screenshot and a complete description of the problem and he can't reproduce the scenario.'

[modi123_1]

I would just point blank say "I do not see the button you were referring to on the screen shot. Did you send me the wrong one?".

[strawhat89]

Yeah I sent a mail saying pretty much the same thing. Now I have a reply insisting that he saw that particular button, but it's not visible now. He asked for some time to replicate the exact scenario and I told him to go ahead. It's been half an hour and still no reply. I'm leaving for the day, good luck to him.

[NeoTifa]

sithius92, on 25 October 2012 - 09:57 AM, said:

NeoTifa, on 12 October 2012 - 04:42 AM, said:

Well, I'm not in the computer industry, I'm actually like in the construction industry, more specifically HVAC. I got customers all the time in the school district I commissioned like

them: "omg I'm freezing in here can you turn up the temperature?"
me: "ma'am, it's 75 deg in here..."
them: "well I'm cold, and you guys made it to where I can't turn it up!"
me: "okay." *walks off
person down the hallway that is fed by the same air handler snags me
person: "omg, it's a blazing inferno down here, can you turn it down? It has to be like 90 deg in here!"
me: "says right here it's 75 deg"
person: "well I'm hot"

OMFG!!! I can't set the temperatures to please everybody's body thermostat! Especially if a big chunk of the hallway is being fed by the same air handler! asdfjkadsfljsdjflksjdfklasj!!!!!!!!!!!

I remember reading a solution someone had to this problem. They bought a dial thermostat and stuck it to the person's cubicle wall. The person then thought they could control the temperature and hadn't complained again.

There are buttons to where they can adjust it.

[BenignDesign]

Boss called this morning and asked me to print out a list of all the people who "Like" us on Facebook.

I did as requested and delivered the printed document to her office.

She flipped through the pages and, after complaining that the list was just names with no other personally identifiable information, asked me how many of them are students and how many of them need to be removed from the list.

Upon informing her that I have no way of knowing how many of them are students and that I would advise against removing people from our Facebook page simply for not being students, she looked at me confused and told me to get her all of Facebook's Google Analytics stats so we can better track our student activity.

[Curtis Rutland]

Stories like that always cut out the best part. You know, the berserker rage-murder and heart-eating.

[alias120]

A few months back we received an email from an end-user who was experiencing an issue with some of our software. So I emailed them back, going over the usual tier-1 solutions they could try and asked them to include in their response more details about the system they were using. Hours go by with no response, and 5 minutes after I leave for the day they finally write back. First email is them asking me to just call them, not responding to any of my questions or indicating they had attempted any of the potential solutions. Only a few minutes later they write back again, and ask why I am ignoring them. Not even five minutes after that they write in asking why I don't like doing my job and to call them back immediately. Finally I get home and their final email is in all caps, demanding that we pay for the time we've wasted in not resolving this issue. Mind you, this is in the course of about 20 minutes.

I imagine their manager must have received the same treatment, needless to say we never heard from them after that.

[Bort]

I have a recurring tech question of the day.

If one of our customers, or even potential customers comes to us looking for a solution the might be possible for our sgnature pads to handle, but we aren't sure, we contact the techies at the manufacturers.

Me: "Is it possible to do X with these pads?"
Them: "What is the potential? We will answer you if you tell us how many pads they will buy."
Me: "Well, we don't know yet. There is no point in continuing with their enquiry if the hardware can't do what they want it to. So, can these pads do X?"
Them: "Tell us how much this is worth and we will consider developing this solution for you." (Translation: They might consider doing something minor to help prod their sales along, but anything major and we are pretty much on our own.)

This happens with them far too regularly for comfort.

I also sent them a mail asking for some advice and explanation for part of their SDK. Their response was 'What is this opportunity worth?' In the end, I just figured it out for myself.

[BenignDesign]

This morning, I received a forward email. It was a Google Alert. It came with this message:

Quote

"Please work your magic and make this link to the employment ad instead of the job description."

Hmm.... sure. Let me work my hacker magic to access Google's database and change their link.

I'll get right on that.

[BenignDesign]

Boss sent me an email around lunchtime asking that I create a graphic for our featured announcements section to alert the public that we will be closed for business from December 19 through January 2.

I created my graphic, uploaded it to the server, updated the database, and sent her a response letting her know it was finished.

She responded, "Is there enough room to add the years in there, too? I don't want to confuse people."

Because the unwashed masses are going to assume you meant we're reopening on
January 2, 3034.

[DarenR]

Mine for the day was---


Customer: The vendor files are missing from vendor x can you restore them.

Me: sure let me take a look

(looking looking)

Me: It looks like you just created this vendor 10 minutes ago.

Customer: yes I did, did you find the vendor files?

Me: Did you upload the vendor files?

Customer: I put the papers against the screen and they disappeared.

Me: You did what and what disappeared?

Customer: The vendor files I put against the screen didnt show up.

Me: Can you please have your manager show you how to use the computer.

Have a good day.

[Python_4_President]

My question for the day was a question to myself..

A well known mega-pet-store was having technical difficulty communicating EDI data to one of their vendors.

The "senior" administrator (deduced from the signature) of the IT team sent a message to, assumably, some underlings in the EDI department regarding some step by step instructions to follow to complete the configuration of the transmission profile. For some reason, he copied me on the message. I've never talked to megapetcompany directly before.

The e-mail was sent from do-not-reply@mega-petcompany.com to no-reply@mega-petcomany.com.

The contents of the message were 4x smaller than the header for the message. The header for the message was larger than for accounts associated with the DoD.

The question was: Who the fuck promoted this guy?


Reminded me of the line from Idiocracy: "My ex-wife was tarded. She flies planes."

This post has been edited by Python_4_President: 30 November 2012 - 03:43 PM