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#1 JackOfAllTrades  Icon User is offline

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PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 05:27 AM

Some enterprising person (to be charitable), purporting to have both B.E.-E & Tc and MBA in Finance and Operations sent his/her résumé via email to the entire company with the following text:

"Kindly please convey me the openings."

Anyone else ever get weird job requests like this?
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#2 no2pencil  Icon User is online

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 05:46 AM

No, but I often get the opposite. I get an email about a job opening, in perfect English, followed up with a phone call that has so much background noise, & is in such broken English that I just hang up.
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#3 DarenR  Icon User is offline

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 07:02 AM

I get many phone calls from people wanting to hire me. Unfortunately I can't understand 95% of them because of broken English and bad phone connections.
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#4 BenignDesign  Icon User is offline

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 07:17 AM

I get weird resumes almost weekly. The "contact" link on our website sends the message directly to me (I am the filter point for almost all of the forms on our site - and there are many. I blacklist the spammers and forward the worthwhile stuff to the appropriate departments).

But I've gotten resumes as text files, as power point presentations, and even a few typed directly into the email (no attachment). They are often accompanied by "Please send me notice of any openings that would fit my skills"-type messages. Because obviously the HR department and I have time to go through every resume we've ever received and match random people to new positions... I've even received a follow-up or two where people complained that they saw a job opening that fit their skill set and were miffed that I didn't contact them about it.

I'm not a headhunter. I'm the webmaster. I don't have the time, the energy, or the patience to sift through resumes just in case we have an opening in which you might be interested. You don't pay me. Do your own leg work.
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#5 lordofduct  Icon User is offline

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 07:39 AM

And when they get hired, they expect you to be their do-all secretary while they "do business" over martinis and scotch down at the bar... errr, "gentleman's lounge".
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#6 jon.kiparsky  Icon User is online

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 08:15 AM

View PostBenignDesign, on 06 December 2012 - 09:17 AM, said:

(I am the filter point for almost all of the forms on our site - and there are many. I blacklist the spammers and forward the worthwhile stuff to the appropriate departments).



Wait, what?

They've got one web developer, and she's also the spam filter?
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#7 BenignDesign  Icon User is offline

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 08:17 AM

She is many things. She should really be paid more.
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#8 jon.kiparsky  Icon User is online

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 08:18 AM

View PostBenignDesign, on 06 December 2012 - 10:17 AM, said:

She is many things.



That's what I hear.

/leers
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#9 modi123_1  Icon User is online

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 08:25 AM

When mom ran her own business there were many interesting fails in applications. Some mailed in with crayon, people calling in to the message box explaining everything about them and failing to provide a contact phone number or address to have us get back to them, and one lady that came in and was wandering around - when asked who she was and what she was doing she curtly replied she was here to apply for a job but had to test the resident energy flow of the work place first.
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#10 Curtis Rutland  Icon User is online

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 08:35 AM

I just recently had someone send me a resume on facebook. Not even someone I know or even knew through a friend. I actually have no idea how he found me, unless he was specifically looking for people who work where I work on facebook. He sent me a private message with his resume attached. An enterprising go-getter, apparently, but I'm neither HR nor am the one in charge of recruiting on our team.
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#11 jon.kiparsky  Icon User is online

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 08:41 AM

View PostCurtis Rutland, on 06 December 2012 - 10:35 AM, said:

I just recently had someone send me a resume on facebook. Not even someone I know or even knew through a friend. I actually have no idea how he found me, unless he was specifically looking for people who work where I work on facebook. He sent me a private message with his resume attached. An enterprising go-getter, apparently, but I'm neither HR nor am the one in charge of recruiting on our team.


Looking at it from his point of view, it's cheap and easy to send an email to someone. If you're in a position to accept a resume, then great, maybe you'll look at it. On the other hand, if you're not, what has he lost by it?
So spamming your resume to the world might be a winning strategy, or at least a non-losing one.
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#12 lordofduct  Icon User is offline

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 08:41 AM

And crazies like that wonder why they don't have a job.


Sounds like my mother...

"Mom, you quit your job AGAIN?" (note - this was in 2009 when no one could find jobs)

"Those bitches were all crazy. They had it out for me. They were going to drive me angry until I quit or snapped. So I showed them, like they'll get to me!"

"You stopped them for making you quit by quitting?"

"They were crazy!"

"Isn't this the same thing that happened at the previous job, and the job before that, and the job before that?"

"Yeah, Florida is just full of lunatics and idiots." (note my mother thinks everyone in the south has an IQ of 10 because we say y'all) "I swear everywhere I go everyone is crazy."

"So you're telling me that the majority of people are crazy and you're the sane one?"

"Yeah... why?"
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#13 AthenaDX  Icon User is offline

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 08:55 AM

My parents own a restaurant (I know, all big fat greek weddin' style here, yo), and we got some interesting people coming in for interviews. We had 16 year olds asking to be bartenders, people coming in during our busiest times and griping about how long it takes to get an application before realizing my dad is the boss and they're now doomed. People coming in drunk off their arses and trying to apply. The people we hire arn't much better. D: We get the bottom barrel, can't afford to pay folks as much as factories in town or Walmart.

The one thing that stands out to me right now, doesn't really have to do with interviewing though, is our last waitress we fired. She had been stealing a hundred or so bucks a night by pretending to ring customers up and pocketing their money. Dad found out, confronted her, and she said that she couldn't help it, she had to pay for the crack somehow and he sure wasn't paying her enough. o.O Then attempted to grill him for not giving her the last paycheck. :/ This woman had 3 kids.

SO MANY STORIES! WALLS OF TEXT ARE AWESOME YO!

This post has been edited by AthenaDX: 06 December 2012 - 08:56 AM

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#14 Curtis Rutland  Icon User is online

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Re: PROTIP: How NOT To Get An Interview

Posted 06 December 2012 - 09:20 AM

View Postjon.kiparsky, on 06 December 2012 - 09:41 AM, said:

View PostCurtis Rutland, on 06 December 2012 - 10:35 AM, said:

I just recently had someone send me a resume on facebook. Not even someone I know or even knew through a friend. I actually have no idea how he found me, unless he was specifically looking for people who work where I work on facebook. He sent me a private message with his resume attached. An enterprising go-getter, apparently, but I'm neither HR nor am the one in charge of recruiting on our team.


Looking at it from his point of view, it's cheap and easy to send an email to someone. If you're in a position to accept a resume, then great, maybe you'll look at it. On the other hand, if you're not, what has he lost by it?
So spamming your resume to the world might be a winning strategy, or at least a non-losing one.


Oh, I don't doubt it. If I were looking for work, I'd consider things like that. It just seemed strange to me as the recipient of it.

View Postlordofduct, on 06 December 2012 - 09:41 AM, said:

And crazies like that wonder why they don't have a job.


Sounds like my mother...

"Mom, you quit your job AGAIN?" (note - this was in 2009 when no one could find jobs)

"Those bitches were all crazy. They had it out for me. They were going to drive me angry until I quit or snapped. So I showed them, like they'll get to me!"

"You stopped them for making you quit by quitting?"

"They were crazy!"

"Isn't this the same thing that happened at the previous job, and the job before that, and the job before that?"

"Yeah, Florida is just full of lunatics and idiots." (note my mother thinks everyone in the south has an IQ of 10 because we say y'all) "I swear everywhere I go everyone is crazy."

"So you're telling me that the majority of people are crazy and you're the sane one?"

"Yeah... why?"


I love it when people can't determine that they are the only common factor in all the equations. Ever hear someone say "I just hate drama, but I always get pulled into it!" No, you create it, you crazy person.
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