How would you get fired?

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20 Replies - 2392 Views - Last Post: 07 September 2008 - 03:59 AM

#1 Winstinology  Icon User is offline

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How would you get fired?

Posted 28 July 2008 - 10:45 AM

If you were to purposefully get yourself fired, (hypothetically), how would you do it? Would you go out with a bang (please don't analyze that word too hard), or would you plan out a stealth ninja move?


I'm still working on mine, but I wanna see what you guys have to say..
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#2 Jayman  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 28 July 2008 - 11:04 AM

I wouldn't ever try to purposely get myself fired. I would quit long before it ever reached that point.

Being fired looks much worse on your resume than quitting.
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#3 Winstinology  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 28 July 2008 - 11:10 AM

View Postjayman9, on 28 Jul, 2008 - 11:04 AM, said:

I wouldn't ever try to purposely get myself fired. I would quit long before it ever reached that point.

Being fired looks much worse on your resume than quitting.




Man you missed the point of the topic..
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#4 bflosabre91  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 28 July 2008 - 11:15 AM

if i really hated the place i still wouldnt do this. but lets say i just won 20 million dollars and i never need to work again, and i hate my current job. i would probably be pretty boring and just no call no show. but if i were to do this at one of the many retail stores, i would just wait for some asshole customer, and just make a complete ass of myself and the managers and just walk out.
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#5 Winstinology  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 28 July 2008 - 11:21 AM

View Postbflosabre91, on 28 Jul, 2008 - 11:15 AM, said:

if i really hated the place i still wouldnt do this. but lets say i just won 20 million dollars and i never need to work again, and i hate my current job. i would probably be pretty boring and just no call no show. but if i were to do this at one of the many retail stores, i would just wait for some asshole customer, and just make a complete ass of myself and the managers and just walk out.




Not a ton of pizazz but still, nicely done.. You hit the topic nail on the head.. Thank you!
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#6 Moonbat  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 28 July 2008 - 11:41 AM

rm -rf /


Need I say more?
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#7 NickDMax  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 28 July 2008 - 02:34 PM

spend all day on DIC.......................

....maybe I should do some work.
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#8 fooboo  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 28 July 2008 - 02:42 PM

View PostMoonbat, on 28 Jul, 2008 - 11:41 AM, said:

rm -rf /

Quality!


A friend of mine who was going to quit his job anyway walked into the boss' office and called him a monkey's cock to his face...that did the trick.
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#9 Programmist  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 28 July 2008 - 02:49 PM

View PostWinstinology, on 28 Jul, 2008 - 11:10 AM, said:

View Postjayman9, on 28 Jul, 2008 - 11:04 AM, said:

I wouldn't ever try to purposely get myself fired. I would quit long before it ever reached that point.

Being fired looks much worse on your resume than quitting.




Man you missed the point of the topic..

I'm agreeing with jayman here. Quitting us much better. That doesn't mean you can't leave behind some surprises, but I would never post anything in apublic forum that could incriminate me. :) I think, for the response you are trying to elicit, you may have meant to post in the Caffeine Lounge. :)
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#10 Tom9729  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 29 July 2008 - 08:58 AM

Write a script that randomly writes to various devices.

Write a script that makes sure overwrite mode (normally toggled with the Insert key) is always on.

Install Windows Vista on all of the work computers.

Switch the keymap to Dvorak.

Turn the audio volume WAY up.

Write a script to replace all images on the system with goatse.

Write a script to redirect all symbolic links to /dev/null.

-------------

I think I would concentrate more on not getting fired though. :)

This post has been edited by Tom9729: 29 July 2008 - 09:00 AM

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#11 Cerolobo  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 29 July 2008 - 04:00 PM

Hmm.....

Well, I've always wanted to stab a water cooler tank. I would probably just devolve into doing a bunch of fairly harmless, but annoying things. Things like stealing all the staples, adding vinegar to the coffee pot water reservoir (Hey! You've got to keep them clean), putting pieces of tinfoil in random locations such as on the cabinet rails, ect...

In any case, I really don't think I would ever be able to bring myself to do such things.
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#12 no2pencil  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 29 July 2008 - 04:48 PM

View PostWinstinology, on 28 Jul, 2008 - 01:45 PM, said:

or would you plan out a stealth ninja move?


Where I work, a move like that would not only get me fired, but would also result in getting me arrested.

I think I'll just tell HR to blow me. That would be more my style anyhow. One time (not where I work now) I called off & told them I had better things to do than to come in that day. It didn't get me fired, but it pretty much told them I was looking elsewhere for work. :^:

View PostNickDMax, on 28 Jul, 2008 - 05:34 PM, said:

spend all day on DIC.......................

....maybe I should do some work.

I speak from experience when I say it's fun.
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#13 KYA  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 29 July 2008 - 07:51 PM

taking a shit on the bosses' desk is always instyle ;)
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#14 Damage  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 30 July 2008 - 03:39 AM

I used to work for small database dev company and as such i worked very closely with the end-users, providing support and training.
In that hypothetical wanting to get fired world...
Why I would have walked right up to a very specific one or two of said end-users and smashed the &@#^ outta their face. Hulk woulda been proud
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#15 mocker  Icon User is offline

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Re: How would you get fired?

Posted 30 July 2008 - 11:41 AM

I wouldn't do anything destructive to the company (that includes rm -rf / and installing windows vista). I would however lay low for a while and write a bunch of easter eggs into the programs running here. Maybe put some code into the router to randomly mess with http requests, or change the asterix server to sometimes reroute a call. Have hidden scripts to email jokes or funny sites with forged headers to different employees, make it look like they are coming from each other. And then, either do a no show, or sit around playing games and refusing to do any work at work until I get fired.

Hypothetical of course, even if I hate a company I'd just quit
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