I'm sorry, but I just can't make myself go to the trouble of answering your question directly. It's like you go into one of those houses where people are unable to throw away their stuff and they have stuff piled everywhere and they want you to help them find a piece of paper they've mislaid. The only response is to tell them they have to clean house, and to offer to help if they are willing.

I know that you're doing this because you lack experience, but you still need to understand that you can do this job with maybe 40 lines of code. If you want me to help you do that, then post back and I'll start giving you lessons.

Lesson 1 is control arrays. For a tutorial, google "vb6 control arrays". (Be careful to avoid all of Microsoft's pollution of google VB6 searches with VB.Net stuff.)

All that theming comes from the OS. That's what keeps a consistent look and feel across an entire computer and why you can go to the Windows control panel and choose blue or green or classic with no drop shadow, or HIGH CONTRAST BLACK and have all the applications shift to the new theme.

First: Move up to a language that isn't dead for new projects, and exists primarily for legacy app support. VB.NET for example

Second: Make a borderless form then you can build your own titlebar WITHIN the userworkspace.