[Gloin]

KYA, on 9 Jan, 2009 - 06:22 AM, said:

Classic condescending. That's beneficial.

Well.. I guess you'd have just beat the crap out of him instead being the big man you are..

[Nykc]

Gloin, on 9 Jan, 2009 - 08:30 AM, said:

Well.. I guess you'd have just beat the crap out of him instead being the big man you are..

Yeah because I guess the only way to discipline a child is beat the shit out of him. I guess a simple slap on the ass will scar a child for life. Now you are just talking dumb.

I can tell from experience you have no clue of what getting the shit kicked out of you really is or you would not have made that remark.

[samf]

Im getting negative vibes from this topic

[OliveOyl3471]

Quote

I can tell from experience you have no clue of what getting the shit kicked out of you really is or you would not have made that remark.

I know what that's like! Maybe some kids never need to be spanked, but I know one thing, mine do. They get spanked when they misbahave (ok not the 16 year old anymore...he is bigger than me now lol). But my children are well behaved! Most of the time. If a parent can get their children to behave without spanking, then go for it. I say, whatever works. Spanking (and other discipline) works for us.

Abuse is different than spanking. Abuse is when the parent hits the child because it makes the parent feel better, not because the child needs discipline.

[Gloin]

samf, on 9 Jan, 2009 - 06:34 AM, said:

Im getting negative vibes from this topic

This is the heated topics, don't worry..


Nykc, at least not by my parents. Alot of the posts here have described the penalty as something different from 'a simple slap on the ass' and even that is not good. It might start off like that but it can very well go overboard. I'm not saying it does in every case but it has surely been known to happen. Kids have died from abuse you know and byt then it usually had been going on for a while, escalating.

[Nykc]

Yes from abuse - a 22 year old father just got sentenced 15 to life yesterday for punching his 3 year old in the stomach and it killed the child. That is abuse - you don't punch the child.

Like I said before I grew up getting spanked, I spank my kids, hell I even spanked my step kid. Is that abuse - nah you don't take it overboard you use it as a corrective action. I spank my children and say I SAID KNOCK IT OFF!

I don't punch my kids in the face - that's abuse. I don't hit my kids till they bruise and or can't move. I paddle there ass.

Hey in the 6th grade I got hit with a paddle several times for acting out. All I did was talk out loud in class and got hit 5 times with a paddle that had holes in it. Public School - "The Board of Education" it was called. Man that shit hurt - it wasn't abuse, but I can promise you I never acted out in that class again.

I think you are confusing discipline with abuse. It could be a cultural thing I am not sure.

Now I can see your point - and I do not completely disagree there is a fine line here, but if you do not take charge as the parent, your children will walk all over you. Standing in the corner, sending to the room does not always work.

I was sent to my room all the time as I got older. I spent most of my life on punishment, I rebelled harder. So what I had to sit in my room - I called girls up and spent hours on the phone chatting. Or I turned on the Nintendo and played for hours on in. Not very effective.

My oldest son is like my best friend, we play 360 together, hang out, etc. I just need to raise my voice if I need to correct him - he is 14 now. I spanked him as a child when he was bad. He knows right from wrong and so far (knock on wood) is nothing like I was at that age - because I was a bad ass kid who needed to get spanked more. My spankings stopped when I was 8. I haven't spanked my step kid since he was 5. Half the time he doesn't listen - he needs to be spanked actually sometimes but I am trying the other approach with him and it doesn't work.

[Gloin]

What if you hadn't had the Nintendo or phone on your room. Perhaps that would have made you think of what you did wrong. I would not have considered being sent to my room where I could play video-games a punishment.
I also think that if you teach your kids responsabilities at an early age, they better understand the differense between right and wrong.

[jjsaw5]

Or you could do like my dad did. He would hit my younger brother and he would just laugh at my dad.

Well then toys started to get broken. I'll never forget one year my brother was just acting retarded and he would not listen to anyone for the life of him. So my dad told him...

"If you don't stop your new power ranger toys are going to the garage and I am taking a hammer to them"

My brother didn't listen, laughed at my dad, next thing I know my dad takes my brother to the garage with his toys and started smashing them with a hammer.

After that my brother didn't act up as much anymore. All my dad had to do was grab a toy and walk towards the gargage and that promptly ended what ever my brother was doing.

My dad put the fear of god into us when we were growing up that we didn't want to get into trouble ( with the expection of my brother for a couple years) because we didn't know what he was going to do.

Not that he was going to beat us relentlessly, but my dad was the kind of guy who told you.

"You get a speeding ticket in this car, the next day it's going up for sale."

One of my younger siblings got a speeding ticket, sure enough when he woke up the next day the car was at the end of the drive way with for sale signs on it, and my dad sold it.

[Gloin]

I have to admit my parents did similar things. My mother used to threaten us (me and my brother) that if we didn't clean our rooms then she'd walk in with the vacuumer and she would use it to clean away anything that was on the floor, including toys. Sure enough she did. Only differense the toys could be removed later from the vacuumer so nothing was destroyed. The message got through though.

[NeoTifa]

My mother used to put locks on the plug (through the hole) on my brothers tv and radio and get sent to his room. That way he could stare at his stuff he couldn't play with. Still didn't work. So.... well.... ahem... now hes in juvie.

[Nykc]

There was a point in time when I didn't have those luxuries. I just snuck out the window. If I was sent to my room I could always find something to occupy my time regardless of what luxuries were in there or not. Once I knew the spankings stopped I didn't care. I remember when I was younger and my mom was like wait till dad gets home. Oh shit - I knew I was in for it. Nothing like waiting 6 hours or more knowing that you are getting a spanking.

Point being - I was more scared of the hand & belt then I was sitting in my room.

[gl3thr0]

wow... parenting through fear... totalitarian society anyone? .. sounds like great advice, lets just scare our kids into listening! that a great idea!

maybe instead of holding diplomatic talks we should just bomb the fuck outa them till they listen to us... hmm thats worked out really good..

ppl turn to violence when they are to inexperienced or unintelligent to find a better solution.

[KYA]

There we go again confusing discipline with violence. Also you don't rationalize with a 5 year old.

[gl3thr0]

Quote

here we go again confusing discipline with violence. Also you don't rationalize with a 5 year old.

instead you beat a five year old?


all "discipline" / "corrective action" / "beating" ever did for me was teach me to lie through my teeth..

parents gave up pretty quick

but then again maybe its nice to live in a house where you think everything is okay.. bt u kids are to scared to tell you whats really wrong

and yes im 17 but i can wipe my on bottom so no worries..

This post has been edited by gl3thr0: 09 January 2009 - 12:31 PM

[KYA]

UGH! Did I say that? No!

What rationalization powers does a 5 year old have? There is right and wrong, not really all that complicated.

This post has been edited by KYA: 09 January 2009 - 12:30 PM